0

一リットルの涙 (One Litre of Tears)

For the entire day today, I sat in front of my computer and cried. Okay, I'm not THAT depressed. It's the J-dorama : 一リットルの涙 (One Litre of Tears). It's the best Japanese drama I've watched ever. And it's the only drama that had me crying at every episode. Watching 'One Litre of Tears', I've cried 1L of tears myself.

One Litre of Tears follows the story of a 15-yr old high school girl, Ikeuchi Aya, whose life was taken a cruel blow when an incurable neural disease, Spinocerebellar Degeneration(SCD), robbed her of her normal life at 15. This drama is based on a true case: SCD manifested in Kito Aya's body at 15 yrs and took her life at 25 yrs. In the J-drama, every detail of the account was impressively delivered: from Aya's shock and hopelessness when she slowly loses control of simple, routine actions, to her courage and optimism to simply continue living; her family's strong yet gentle support throughout her most difficult and miserable times of the illness; her friends' company and help throughout the trying times; the determination and helplessness of the doctors who tried every way to find a cure for her disease.

I must say, this drama allowed me to view life in a different light. It would be a lie to say I never entertain thoughts such as, "What is the purpose of my living? It wouldn't make any difference if I had died, so why am I living? Wouldn't it be better if I had been dead? What is the purpose in life?" After watching this drama and seeing how things that I take for granted are slowly being robbed away from Aya, I am terribly ashamed to have actually thought that my life served no purpose. Like Haruto Asou said, human are greedy and selfish. When I watch Aya slowly lose her ability to walk, run, speak, eat and breath, I couldn't help the tears that keep falling, and thought "What does it feel like to have your life slowly taken away from you, piece by piece? What does it feel like to slowly lose the ability to walk or speak? How does it feels like to live on for 10 yrs while your body slowly give away, as you slowly lose control over simple actions?" The magnitude and intensity of pain imagined is unbearable. And yet, Aya bravely faced the life that is slowly shattering before her. If it were me, I would not have the courage to smile and face life or the people around me. For her to be able to smile and inspire the people around her to keep on living and treasure life, I have my utmost respect and admiration for Aya. No matter how afraid she feels in her crumbling body, she struggles to find a reason to keep on living and did not give up until the end of her life.

From her story, I learnt to treasure life, to appreciate the fact that I have the chance to keep living, to be thankful for the simple fact that I am healthy, to be grateful that I can do the things that I want to do, to cherish the people and things that are important to me.

Because of Aya's inspiration, I will remind myself each time when I lose hope, that I must continue living, because "Just being alive is such a wonderful and lovely thing" (Kito Aya).

~みはる~

Official site:
いちリットルの涙

Sorry, not interested

I reached the Woodlands checkpoint today all bleary-eyed and half-conscious. The express bus driver had sped the entire journey thru, bringing the 10-hr journey to less than 8 hrs. I barely slept at all as I could feel the frightening speed of the bus even as I was drifting to slumber. It was so scary I thought he might skid off the road anytime.

Instead of reaching the immigration at 9 am, I had to join the long queue at 7 am. Arrghh, because the bus sped, we reached in time to join the many workers rushing across the Causeway. Bleh. So, dragging my large luggage with me, I waited (not so patiently) for my turn. I thought I could easily clear the customs, but apparently the officer was suspicious of this puny girl lugging such a huge baggage into Singapore. So I may not look totally innocent, but hey, would a puny, bleary-eyed girl carry weapons or drugs across the Causeway? Of course, I let the officer opened my luggage and check to his heart's content. He was a nice person though, making friendly conversation while I explained the things I stuffed in my bag. After he okay-ed my baggage, I had to cram the contents back in and zip the overflowing luggage shut. I was a bit amused at the irony: last night after my dad helped me cram my stuff in the bag, I had insisted to try zipping the bag myself while telling Dad that just in case the officers check, I would need to know how to shut the overflowing contents back in. "Although, usually they will never check my bag", I told Dad. Hah. I was so wrong :P

After clearing the customs, I walked across the pedestrian bridge towards the taxi stand at the other building of the checkpoint. Because the luggage was heavy and bulky, I opted for the elevator over the escalator. So, I was alone waiting for the ride, when a man joined me at my wait. He was a middle-aged man, definitely not local (Sg/Msian) but from his looks, is probably an European or Middle-east kind of person. He had not-so-pleasant facial features and carried nothing with him, except for passport in his hands. So, standing opposite me, he started to make conversation. Diverting his eyes to my large luggage, he asked "From K.L?". Out of courtesy, I replied, "No, Penang." Then he said something like "Ohh, Penang...bla bla...". I couldn't hear very clearly because he was speaking quite softly, and I didn't bother to clarify as I wasn't interested. So I just smiled politely and nodded my head. Then the elevator arrived and I went in after him. After coming out of lift, he slowed down to walk next to me and indicated if I needed help with my luggage. "No thanks," I smiled. (I have this principle of not asking help from someone I cannot trust on first sight). I had thought that he would walk away but he kept to my pace and kept on talking to me. I think he was saying something about the weather being warm and stuff like that; I wasn't really paying attention, so I just uttered umm and yea at appropriate intervals out of politeness... until he said, "Can I have your contact number?". The automatic umm/yea was on the tip of my tongue when the alarm bells in my head started clanging like mad. For a moment I was stunned. A torrent of thoughts thrashed in my brain. Omigod, he's hitting on me just like this? This suspicious guy probably wants to screw any girl he picks up by chatting about the warm weather. Shit, how do I get out of this?? He could be a serial killer or kidnapper waiting to rape or kill me!! Okay, so I may have some extreme thoughts, but in my defense, these cases do happen. There had been numerous news about naive girls falling into such traps and never saw the light of day ever again. I sure do not want to be part of the statistics.

With my inner voices screaming inside my head, I finally decided to play dumb and uttered, "Huhh?", in pretence of having not heard his words and hoping that (somehow) he would forget about it. But crap, he asked again, this time adding something about forming friendship and stuff. By this time, my warning meter is close to explosion and I bluntly replied, "I'm sorry but I'm not interested." I heard myself saying it quite firmly, so I quickly added "But it was nice to meet you" in order to be polite. He then smiled and continued talking about something, but I wasn't really listening. In fact, I was feeling pretty scared already. When is he gonna leave me alone? My inner voice screamed in my head. I tried to slow my pace but it didn't work. Finally, I reached another elevator, silently praying that he would take the stairs this time. Thank goodness for the blessings from the Goddess of Mercy, he really did opt for the stairs and bid goodbye as I rushed into the elevator and punched the door-close button. Thinking it was over, I emerged from the lift and walked towards the taxi stand - just to find him there also walking towards the waiting taxi. My heart dropped to the ground as I contemplated to turn around and run in the opposite direction. Unfortunately, he saw me... but fortunately, he just said byebye and got into the cab and left. I breathed a sigh of relief. That was quite an unpleasant encounter. I don't mean to be paranoid or judgemental, but there are some people whom I cannot trust at first sight and gives me jitters. And to hit on someone after a small talk about weather is waaaay beyond my liking or logic. What appalled me was that I was hardly appealing to be a pick up target at all: bleary-eyed, clumsy and reeking of the I-spent-one-night-without-sleep-and-am-cranky-now aura, anyone normal would not come any nearer than an arm's radius to me.

I got into the cab, relieved but weaken. My heart was still racing a bit but I breathed easier. I think I must have held my breath the entire time he was walking next to me. So, I thought I could ride in silence and calm my nerves... but fate has it, the taxi driver was the 2nd eccentric individual I had to put up with today. Mr.-Taxi-Driver is apparently a sage on road safety. He suddenly started complaining to me about the dangers of riding motorbikes and how the bike riders are oblivious to the dangers of their driving habits. He had analyzed the subtle differences between Malaysian and Singaporean motorists and draw his conclusions to why bikers on the outer lanes will more likely die in accidents than bikers riding in the inner lanes. Then he went on to relate his experience as a biker and the accidents he had encountered. He gave his very vocal presentation to me all in a super loud and sharp voice. I didn't really care, especially after the restless bus ride and the disturbing encounter with the suspicious guy. So I just littered mmm, ohhh, yes, aiyo, and tsktsk at the appropriate intervals of his presentation. I had hope that at my obvious disinterest he would stop yakking, but Mr-Taxi-Driver was oblivious to my monotone and persisted with his lecture all the way till I reached my destination.

I think I have enough kowai incidents for one day. Anymore will really freak the bejeezers out of me.

~みはる~
0

おまたせ

Okay, I've started blogging about Hokkaido and Tokyo here : Musings in Hokkaido & Tokyo. Omataseshimashita :) There's a link to this page on the sidebar too.

Will ganbaru finish writing. Been very busy these few days settling immigration, laundrying and shopping for stuff before returning to Sg, all the while juggling an episode or two of anime :P Ahh, and if it is not already obvious, I've done some homework studying html tags and revamped my blog templates *pats herself on the back* But I've still more to learn, so yoroshiku onegashimasu.

またね。

~みはる~
0

ただいま帰りました。。?

It's a been almost 28 hours since I've return from Tokyo. But in about 55 hours, I'll be leaving for my campus in Singapore again. Wow... I'm actually home for like less than 10 days?

So, I was in the Immigration office in the city centre just now, and I encountered this hazukashii moment again. Everytime I put down my thumb for the thumb-print scanning in the immigration/registration department, the officer will give me this annoyed look and say "Your thumb print is undetectable!". Okay, like so, I have a bad thumb. It has faint prints. Computers can't read it. Baka technology. It's not like it's my fault my thumb prints can't be read. It's probably genetics. This time round, the lady told me, "Tak boleh scan lah. Ibu jari rosak." I looked at my thumb and went, huhh? How can ibu jari be rosak... it is peeling a little due to the dry weather in Japan, but my ibu jari is not rosak okayy. However, she didn't pursue the matter further and cleared my passport renewal application. I just hope that I won't be held up at international customs and be accused to be an illegal immigrant without thumb prints.

On another note, I think I'm going thru some sort of post-travel-culture-shock-syndrome (PTCSS). In the process of renewing my passport, I had to pay for the application form. So after I handed the Malay lady officer the money, she gave me the form and guess what? I automatically blurted, "Arigatou gozaimasu." Oops.. kinda forgot I'm already back in Malaysia. I don't know if it was loud enough to reach her ears, but I was positive she gave me this weird look. I think somewhere in the grooves of my brain, my subconscious is still in Japanese mode. I still anticipate Japanese responses and the frequently used "Sumimasen" and "Arigatou gozaimasu" are still set as default conversational replies. Now, where is my reset button?

~みはる~

Perspective - 日本の旅行

For this 10 days 8 nights trip to Japan's Hokkaido and Tokyo, we spent approximately an average of 244,000 yen per person. This amount is inclusive of everything: air ticket, accomodation, transportation, food, and miscellanous. I find it quite reasonable, considering that the food we take was generally scrumptious and the transportation is usually by trains, subways, and also domestic flights.

The weather forecast in Japan is generally VERY accurate. If it was forecasted to rain the next day, it definitely rained the next day. As such, we were very dependent on the weather forecast to plan our itinerary for the following day. Temperature forecasts are also very useful to help decide how thick our clothes should be. However, it is found to be wise to keep a cardigan close just in case the cold breeze comes blowing.

Public transportation in Japan is incredibly organized, systematic, punctual and above all, efficient. I absolutely love the JR trains and subway systems. Different lines served different regions, thus you can get around everywhere easily. There are different types of trains: from local (普通) to rapid express (快速) to limited express(特急). Thus, you can choose to speed through all the intermediate stations if you want to reach the other end of the line fast. And I must say, the public transport in Japan is PUNCTUAL. The trains or buses arrive right on the dot and depart exactly on time too. Thus, you can always conveniently plan ahead of time. Although some busy stations can be quite confusing with so many train lines intersecting, it is very systematic once you know how to move about. From the designated platforms, to the systematically categorized train cars and seats, to the well-planned exits at every stations, I have come to enjoy taking the public transportation in Japan because it is made so convenient. My only complaint is that it is very expensive :P

Food is quite expensive in Japan, especially in Tokyo. I mean like, really expensive for my budget. A set meal of lunch/dinner can cost at least 2,000 yen in certain food outlets. However, the konbini(s) here live up their name (konbini = convenient stores). They sell all the essentials (something like your 7-eleven, but there are more stuff sold), and especially the BENTO. Bento(s) from the convenient stores are really life savers in several scenarios: (i) food is expensive and you want to save some money. (ii) there's no decent restaurants or food stalls in the remote area you are standing. (iii) when you are so terribly hungry you can't walk another step. Apart from food, the konbini is our ultimate provider of mizu (plain water), ocha (Japanese green tea is a must all the time), moisturising cream (the cold weather can really crack your delicate skin - yes, mine's all cracked and callused), and batteries for your camera =D. There are a great variety of konbini chains in Japan; amongst the more popular ones I've seen are Seico, am/pm, Lawson, and of course, 7-eleven.

Travelling light is highly recommended if you have plans to move around often. I'm pretty glad we decided to travel light (i.e. one backpack + one carry on per person) as it was much much more convenient this way when taking the public transportations. It would be dreadful to have to lug heavy and bulky luggages up and down the trains and subways, and then dragging them horizontally and vertically across the stations (believe me, you'd be deadbeat if you had a large suitcase because transferring from one line to another may require a great deal of walking). Furthermore, if you have to travel at peak hours, you would need to prepare to face the unbelievable throng of people inside and outside the trains. Massive massive number of people. I find it quite convenient to pack light because we easily found coin laundries in each of the stop we made. Some coin laundries can be pretty expensive, but generally it costs about 300 yen to wash and another 300 yen to dry.

Travelling to Japan at this time (late spring-early summer) is probably one of the best times. During the entire trip, I felt as if I'd experienced an entire year in Japan: from snow-capped mountains to blooming sakura, and gentle spring breeze to light summer showers. From Hokkaido to Tokyo, I've seen the untouched wilderness and bustling metropolitan city cramped with high rise. The weather is not too cold, but not too hot: thus, it is a perfect cool weather for sightseeing in light wear.



Mankai sakura trees at Temiya Park in Otaru, Hokkaido.

The Japanese are generally very helpful and friendly people. Although my ability to converse in Japanese is super fundamental, we can still get around relatively easily as they are very willing and patient to help us out. However, for regions that are located in the outskirts of cities, most do not understand English and basic Japanese would be quite necessary to communicate effectively. However, I had alot of fun attempting to communicate in Japanese with the Japanese community. Thank you LJ81 Japanese Level2, you saved my life out there in Hokkaido >_<

In order to truly experience Japan and be immersed in their culture, I am all for self-travelling. Travelling with tour groups is relatively more rigid and 'packaged' - you won't be able to really experience the quirks of travelling in the JR trains and chikatetsu (subways), observe the nature and lifestyles of the Japanese up close, discover the different types of local food outlets and their unique features, or walk parallel to and interact intimately with the local community. It is much more fun to discover Japan, rather than be shown to; and it is far more flexible and pleasurable to travel at our own pace. Probably because my previous trips to China with tour groups had not been exactly pleasant, rather, they felt very hectic. Although probably many more tourist spots would be covered by the tour groups, I totally enjoyed moving around at my own intiative and time.

In a nutshell, I thoroughly enjoyed my one week in Japan. 本当にとても楽しかったですよ。絶対にまた今度日本へもう一度旅行にいきます。 I will definitely plan for the next one in near future. This time, I'd like to try to Kusatsu onsen in Gunma and breath the scent of lavender in Furano.

So if you would excuse me, I'm now off to scheme how to earn 300,000 yen for the next Japan trip.

PS: I will be posting a more detailed account at a later date ;)

~みはる~

Note from Hokkaido,Japan

Location : Hotel New Sunroute Sapporo, Susukino, Sapporo
Time : 2235

そうだよ。今は、北海道の札幌市にいます。
Yup,currently sitting in the hotel lobby getting my dose of internet.Pardon the slightly weird post...the keyboard and software are all in Japanese,chotto difficult to use.I was checking the list of anime updates and there is a long list of new episodes waiting to be downloaded and watched. Being the anime junkie that I am,I terribly miss my weekly anime dose. However, it has been so much fun in Hokkaido so far.I feel like I am in heaven, having seen the mankai sakura,volcanoes,onsens,gorgeous lakes and craters...it is absolutely saiko (最高).
I will update again about my experiences here after I return from Tokyo.

今もう遅いから、お風呂に入らなければなりません。
じゃ、また今度ね。

~みはる~
0

いってきます

My eyes are all glazed over now. I've been up all day researching the websites, planning the travelling routes around Hokkaido. And, goodness gracious, most of the helpful information are available only in Japanese. Since my Japanese is like so rudimentary, understanding the information is such an uphill task; not to mention planning the trip. がんばろう私!!

But since it's holiday... I allowed myself the liberty to watch a reasonable list of animes :P Below are the list of animes I've watched and reviewed a bit here.

BLEACH 79
Jigoku Shoujo 17
xxxHolic 05

So like, yea, I'm pretty much an anime otaku :P
Anyway, gotta continue planning my Hokkaido trip. Will update when I'm back from Japan in 2 weeks time.
いってきます!

~みはる~
0

25-hour record

FINALLY - year3 semester is over.

And what a way to end it. I stayed up 25 hours without sleep just to complete the cursed lab report. So much for my precious weekend. Instead of lazying around and slacking like all normal people do when they finally get a good break, me and my cohort were slaving to meet the deadline today. Assignments like these rob you of the pleasure of experimentation.

Now, I can look forward to sleeping long hours and watching all the animes and J-doramas awaiting my viewing. Oh, but I'm so excited as I'll be going off to Japan for a holiday with my family. We'll be roaming the wilderness of Hokkaido and threading our way thru the lively Tokyo in a few days. Definitely can't wait to get there!!

As for now, I'm so exhausted I really need to hit the sack. Keeping awake for 25 hrs writing a scientific report is truly no easy feat.
0

ただいま

Finally, it all ended yesterday. Semester examinations from hell. I don’t want to walk back down that path, reliving all the depressing and stressful thoughts. Simply glad it’s all over. But the Demon King (as proclaimed by Komatsu Nana), had another trick up its sleeve.

Right after the last paper ended at 4pm yesterday, I headed straight back into my room and packed my stuff. It took me less than an hour, since I did not have much to bring home. Then, I was piling my lecture notes at one corner of the room, feeling relieved the semester is over, and then checked my checklist for the tasks I had to carry out before leaving the room…. and realized that I HAVE ANOTHER LAB REPORT TO BE SUBMITTED BY NEXT MONDAY! Crap… and this is one horribly difficult report to write too. The literature search itself is tedious. Urgh, it feels like the ominous cloud still hangs over my head.

So anyway, I then left my room for the bus stop to catch a cab to the express bus pick up centre. When I reached the bus stop and peered out into the street… the view was (in a sense) gothic-ly magnificent:
An almost stagnant mist hung low in the street-lamp lined avenue. Dim yellow lights bathed the street, the fog blurred the night scene… it was like stepping into Edgar Allan Poe’s horror town. From beyond the shadows, the denizens of the night emerged, fangs bared, ready to sink into the soft flesh of the standing lone mortal, the taste of sweet blood lingering in their tongues.

Sou desu yo.

The incredulously huge mosquitoes feasted on my blood. Apparently, I’m always the mosquitoes’ juicy meal when waiting for a cab to the bus pick up point. Each time, without fail, on my trip back to hometown, I’m subjected to multiple bites from these monstrous species.

Anyway, I managed to get on the bus safely, but like always, I couldn’t get decent sleep in the bus. Probably it’s because I still cannot get use to sleeping in express buses, they are simply uncomfortable. But I do love the night view from the bus. Everytime during my journey home, the skies are peppered with beautiful stars. These cosmic wonders never cease to captivate me – the stars truly looked like diamonds in the sky. I could gaze at the constellations forever, they look so beautiful. Of course, I gave up gazing after like 5 minutes, because the bus was speeding on this super bumpy federal road and it was simply nauseating to continue gazing at the gorgeous natural sight.

Oh, let me tell you about the assisstant bus driver. He’s a bit weird. When the bus resumes journey after the first toilet-break, I took of my shoes and snuggled under the blanket I brought with me (it’s freaking cold in the bus you know). I always do that, without a problem. I mean like, how can there be a problem, you just want to rest comfortably right? Ok, apparently Mr.Assistant-Bus-Driver did not share the same sentiment. When he “patrolled” down the aisle, he stopped next to my seat and said (in mandarin) “You cannot remove your sport shoes”. Initially, I hadn’t heard him right, because I had earphones in the way. Then I stared at him and uttered “ah?” He repeated what he said and I was like - huh??????
Since I didn’t want to make a big fuss, I complied. Just because I boarded the bus from Singapore, do I have to comply with SIA-like take-off/landing procedures? I was amused but oh, what the hell. Then, when I reached my destination, Mr.Asisstant-Bus-Driver was at the boot of the bus, waiting for the passengers to unload their luggages. Mine was particularly bulky although light, because I needed a larger luggage to fit my comforter (the laundry machines in hostel are tad disgusting to wash my fluffly comforter, so I brought it back to clean). So when I went down to take my luggage, this weird guy reprimanded me, “See, why you have to bring such a big luggage. Told you it’s heavy.”
I was like “ 。。。” I just stared at him bewildered, thinking, “So what? あんたと関係ないですよ。If I wanted to carry stones and boulders in this luggage, it also has nothing to do with you.” I was slightly put off, but thought that maybe driving along the bumpy federal roads must have affected his brainwaves, thus decided to overlook his nasty remark.

Well, all aside, it is truly wonderful to be home again.

ただいま。


~みはる~
0

雨が降っています

The weather imp is fooling with me.

I'm telling you, it's true. This is the second time around. I woke up early today, probably because I was unconsciously stressed about the amount of material I have to review for tomorrow's paper. But anyway, I decided to do my laundry since I was already up early and the laundry machines would most likely be available. When my laundry was done and I intended to put them on the laundry lines to dry, light shower rained from the semi-clear sky. And the sun was shining brightly too. And then the magnitude of rainfall gained power, escalating into a stronger shower.

.........................

I could imagine the mischievous weather imp grinning naughtily while skipping over the rainbow, foiling my attempt to decently air-dry my clothes and at the same time taunting me with the beautiful sunshine strong enough to dry my clothes. I can already hear it, "aww... such pretty sunshine, don't you want to put your clothes out to dryyyyy??" This is where I throw a wire-hanger and a handful of clothes pegs at the rainbow-hopping imp. And yesterday, the sun was shining like mad! It was so freaking hot. Darn... must be like a weather curse on me or something.

13.04.06 - LJ81 Japanese Language Level2
20.04.06 - BS306 Developmental Biology
24.04.06 - BS 307 Computational Biology and Modeling
27.04.06 - BS308 Cancer Biology
02.05.06 - BS309 Human Genetics
04.05.06 - BS310 Experimental Techniques in Molecular Biology

Yoshh... it's down to the very last paper. It's 27 hours 37 minutes 17 seconds to the last paper.
今ちゃんと勉強します!!最後の試験ですから、もっとがんばります!

~みはる~
Back to Top