29.02.08 - Leap Day

Today is pretty extraordinary, because the date occurs only once in 4 years: 29th February, the extra day for the year. I call it the 'Leap Day'.

What makes it all the more significant, not necessarily completely pleasant, is that:

First, we finished putting the 3000 pieces puzzle!!

For recreation, my supervisor had bought a super-difficult 3000 pieces jigsaw puzzle for all us lab members to play when we feel bored or tired in the office. Initially, the brilliantly colored cathedral seemed like one truly impossible feat, but the enthusiasm of each and every lab member caught on, and soon we found ourselves frequently crowding around the frame of the puzzle, addicted to putting the pieces together. And in a month, we completed the 3000-piece puzzle. We were particularly determined to finish it today, because we wanted to commemorate the departure of one of our members, R. It is quite meaningful, because all of us, including R, had cheated much of our working time to play this jigsaw :P The puzzle we put together had been a bond that strengthen our ties and given us much fun together.

The epilogue was particularly satisfactory and fun, because 4 of us - LB, Shal, MH, and myself - were bending over the table, our faces nearly touching the puzzle as our eyes scanned excitedly over the remaining few pieces that would fit. The last few pieces were not easy as they were all black, so we were frantically exchanging pieces and blindly trying to fit each piece, while competing to see who would finish her 'zone' fastest. We all felt exhilarated and satisfied when the 3000-th piece was fitted snugly and tada! - our puzzle is done!

It's not so much the pretty picture to me, but rather the memories of putting it together that makes the serene cathedral looked so beautiful.

It would be nice if my boss gets another 3000-piece jigsaw....


Second, as mentioned, my colleague, R, chose to depart our lab for her new job today, the Leap Day.

While it had been only 6 months since we started working together, I had enjoyed working with her because having a post-doc with me was reassuring, in the sense, I could consult someone more experienced than myself in doing my project. I had accepted her decision for departure when she informed us last month, and I thought, 'People come and people go, it's great we have known each other'.

And I thought I wouldn't be sad. But today, somehow, I didn't really want to ask her what things she might have to pass to me, because suddenly, I felt a pang of sadness that she will be leaving. Although it hadn't been long, she had been my partner from the moment we started this new project together, and I have become so accustomed to her presence and philosophical expertise that it didn't occur to me I would feel the emotional impact when she leaves. I supposed it would be a bit harder the next few weeks, that I when I swivel my chair around, she's no longer sitting behind me and there's no one to share stories and opinions about our bacteria, or lives, or any everyday happenings for that matter.

But somehow, I learnt from her that we need to accept and cherish people in our lives and the memories they give us, because life is impermanent and change is constant.


Third, if I hadn't called today Leap Day, I would call it Emotion Day. Somehow, a torrent of pleasant, and unpleasant, emotions churned throughout the day, making me feel happy and sad all at the same time.

Today I saw an acquaintance depressed, and it makes me sad that I do not know how to help her. Also today I hear a family member unhappy, and that I cannot do anything to help, it makes me even sadder. And when I felt like I had to tread on eggshells with these people whom I care about and are depressed, and that I do not know how to deal with them to make them better, I am simply overwhelm by sadness. It just makes me think, 'Allow me a moment of selfishness. Why is it that everyone seemed to have the right to go down, and that I had to shoulder all these dark clouds, for if not, they will break?'.

It's not that I didn't want to help, but everything had to come at once that it is so overwhelming. And it is pretty frustrating that I find myself, again, emotionally weak, no matter how strong I thought I was.

But it's not all sad. I had some happy things going on too, but, believe me, negativity can wipe out all happy feelings in one wave.


In a wishful sense, eventful Leap Day will come only once in 4 years. I hope.

～みはる～

Negativity of sorts

I'm kinda seething right now, because my former landlady has been insinuating that I allowed more than the contracted number of people stayed in her house. And she get to know that from 'neighbours', people who live at my level but never see, or say 'hi' to us. I'm suspecting her daddy told some tall tales. But I let it slide; besides who can win an argument with a frail old grandpa. Young people are always in the wrong, no matter how right they are. But 2 things I cannot let slide:

(1) accusing that I do not keep my word. When I say I did it, I did it. When I say I didn't do it, I didn't do it. I absolutely hate it when people say they trust me, but still have the cheek to distrust my words.

(2) believing hearsay when confirmation can be obtained directly from me. I don't understand what crap 'good relationship' she claims we had when she believed what neighbours told her and never asked me anything for clarification. I have never really seen or talked to the neighbours, nor have the neighbours the friendliness to make conversation with us. And it's not like we're problematic. Looks who's the one in trouble with loan sharks.

In other words, I loathe hypocrites.

At the repeated insinuation, my offended receptors ticked and I angrily made it clear that the number of tenants had always been the same. She claimed I was defensive and aggressive, ruining the 'good relationship' we had. With that I lost my cool, and sarcastically threw back that it's so nice that with such a good relationship, she would rather distrust me over neighbours. I've never quite lost my head over such small issues, but she just hit the offensive nail by indirectly questioning my integrity; the one thing I never compromise.


I'm also pretty sad right now, because Mum just told me that one of the kittens at our backyard might have got into a little accident and as a result is now limping. Couple of weeks ago, two of the 5 kittens were gone; either drown in the huge drain behind our house near their playground, or kidnapped by somebody. And one of them is my favorite, White-paw. She is so sweet to look at and now she's gone. Then left 3, sad little kittens -Siren, Noisy, Sleepy- meowing pitifully for food, like a broken family. And awfully, the remaining black kitten, Sleepy, is now limping and don't look too healthy. No longer do we see the kittens playfully wrestling, lazily napping together, or meowing together in full force pleading for cat food. Hopefully they make it through adulthood.

～みはる～

DSLR

Been fooling with DSLR during my trip home recently.
And this is the outcome of sis and me clicking away.
We loved it.

And the tigers in our backyard...

A whole family of 5 cuddling together, sleeping in the morning cold.

A portrait of two sisters: White-paw & Noisy (who incidentally, had become FAT)

Siren insists on a sister portrait too.

We called this Sexy. He loves sexy poses.

Noisy is not only fat but lazy too.

Lazy noon nap.

L-A-Z-Y

～みはる～

Of quizzes

I don't do this kind of stuff often... but curiosity and childishness got better of me ^^

Which Disney Princess Are You?
	You are Belle. You are strong, deep, and you are not a slave to petty superficial things. You are independent and allow yourself to see inner beauty without sacrificing your values. You are almost too good of a person.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Just so happened Belle is my favourite Disney girl of all.

Which Type of Music Should You Listen To?
	You should listen to Classical Music. You are sophisticated, intellectual, and complex--not to mention a bit snobby sometimes. Not everyone understands you, but hey, you know you're better than them.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Just so happened I like listening to classical music.

What City Should You Live In?
	You should live in Paris. The city of lights will appeal to your appreciation of beauty and romance. You are a lover and a poet by nature, and Paris' sensitive charms will be a perfect match for yours.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Just so happened Paris is my next dream vacation city.

Try it?

～みはる～

A moment please...

Happened to read a very inspiring article in the newspaper several days ago. It seemed as if the writer had reflected everything I had at heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~*~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A MOMENT, PLEASE…

On a bracing cold February morning two years ago, I stood, alone, on a little bridge over a fish pond in the temple of Shi-tenno-ji in Osaka, Japan.

I cast the burdens from my heart to the fish, and silently called them to gobble up the detritus. I promised to feed them with real meal when I return to the shrine dedicated to four mythical kings who brought Buddhism to the islands.

Perhaps it is my vivid imagination, but they swam from far and began feeding, on something that must have drifted to the spot where I had cast my sorrows.
I believe, somehow, I am beholden to fulfil this pledge to fish who wait, in their watery habitat.

The heart has grown weary since that Lunar New Year.
Tomorrow ushers in another new one, ruled by the Rat, with an opportunity for renewal.
The hopes of the past year have dimmed, but many new dreams flare again.

Who knows what the fates have in their works for us, in the months to come? Even Guanyin, Goddess of Mercy, says in her oracles that no one can know his true destiny.

Life is a journey that begins from the moment we enter this world, but it does not come with a roadmap that leads to that promised land where all our wishes are fleshed out in colour.
It is more like a ticket to ride into the unknown, weighted with emotional baggage along with the way. There’s so much we dream to achieve in a lifetime, places to go to, people we hope to meet and adventures to live.

But few of us dare to follow the compass of our heart, but go with the reality of our mundane lives, hemmed by human fears and frailties, instead.
And, of course, some day, we start counting all the if-only and why-hadn’t-I of life, and wonder if it couldn’t have turned out differently.

Maybe yes, maybe no. Life is like a football game, where players must look for opportunities, or create them.
The rules of play may be pre-determined. But the score of hits and misses is still up to us.

We are all players in life’s great game, but without the luxury of extra time. Or, as Liza Minelli sang in the old movie Cabaret, start by admitting, from cradle to tomb, it isn’t that long a stay.

Why waste time, lingering on regrets and self-pity?
The past cannot be lived again. But today, and the future, can be planned for.

This Lunar New Year, I have therefore resolved to put away fears and disappointment, rather than let them block my forward path.
I will carefully make plans for the rest of the year to come, and live each day, as it unfolds.

Above all, at some point, I must return to that pond in the shrine, and to the Guanyin (Kannon) temple at Asakusa in Tokyo.
Though Guanyin is universal, it is at Senso-ji that she feels most special, for personal reasons.
It is there, too, after my last visit to the shrine with its three-inch golden statuette, that my faith was tested.

But I like to think that my belief had never wavered, for it is to her that I return again and again, for guidance.
In the end, it is faith that keeps us going, and leads us into the future without fear.

Gong Xi Fa Cai

By Alistair Tan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~*~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

～みはる～

初めてのヴィオリンレッスン

A month ago, I went for my first violin class.
A month later, I'm enjoying playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star ^^

Kotomi, my beginner's violin

It really helped that I had some background theory in reading music. Because I was able to read the score, I could channel my efforts to improve on my pitching (I'm quite the opposite of pitch perfect) and fingering (my bones are most inflexible).

On my first lesson, I received my pre-ordered beginner's violin (which from now on shall be called Kotomi) and naturally, was quite excited about playing it. When my tutor picked it up and strummed the strings, her face fell. "This is very out of tune". Daang. So while I played on her violin, she helped me tune Kotomi. So she was turning the scrolls, tuning and tuning, and suddenly the A-string snapped. We both looked at Kotomi, dumbfounded. A brand new violin snapping. My, it sure gives lots of confidence.

But it could be my tutor tweaked the A-string scroll a little too much. So we changed the A-string, which was a good opportunity for her to show me how to change the strings on my own.

One month later, Kotomi is doing well and sounding good, except when I bow weird (which is like 70% of the time....? ^^;) We have covered most of the notes on the first fingerboard position, so I could already start playing pieces in D and A major. やった！

I'm looking forward to the day I can play a violin sonata.
これからもがんばります！

～みはる～

Nodame in Europe

FujiTv seriously threw money into this:

The highly popular classical music Japanese comedy drama returned with a special 2-episode sequel. Get this: it was filmed in France and Czech Republic over a duration of approximately 3-4 months. Which is why you see....

.... backdrops so gorgeous they make you wanna fly to Europe.

.... gaijins who speak Nihongo.

....conductor concours in historical concert halls in the mecca of classical music (Prague).

.... Mozart playing in a chateau. (yes, that is Ueno Juri cosplaying)

Coupled with Tamaki Hiroshi and Ueno Juri reprising their roles as Chiaki & Nodame, the 2-episode special screamed MUKYAAA. Uh, that is Nodame vocab for FANTASTIC. The directors to this drama never failed to deliver the best. I salute their incredible production so well done; it seemed to me they had brought the manga alive. The story followed the manga storyline very closely, right down to the dialogue. Of course some scenes were adapted to the practicality of filming, but the changes were pretty insignificant. Furthermore, the music followed the manga religiously. We actually get to listen to all the classical works mentioned in the manga, such as Ravel's Miroirs, Tchaikovsky's Violin Concerto, etc.

What was incredibly unbelievable and hilarious was they managed to get angmohs speaking fluent Japanese. Jean Donnadieu, the French conductor character, was rolling in Japanese, not French! It turns out they cleverly used foreign talents or half-Japaneses, such as Wentz Eiji (Frank) and Becky (Tanya) which gives the drama such novelty. Furthermore, they introduced a lot of new characters, which is very refreshing. I can't even start picking a favourite, because I like all of them!

The sceneries really took my breath away. The directors had generously included outdoor shots, making the audience feel like they are in Europe with the main characters... which is so captivating. And it goes without saying, the music is so fantastic it melt my ears. What was very clever of the producers was they managed to use the music at the appropriate points of the drama, captivating the audience with the power of illusion and sound.

This is like the best 2-episode special I've ever watched. It is worth sitting through the 4 whole hours simply because.... it's Nodame Cantabile. If you don't watch this, you're missing really good stuff.

Images from Memento. Visit them for great reviews.
Official site: Nodame Cantabile

～みはる～

The Persistence of Memory

On the first day of this month, I had my very first taste of a gala orchestra concert smack in the heart of Singapore's finest concert hall. It was probably the most upscale concert I have ever attended. (evening dresses and kimono's!!)

Yes, I was at Esplanade Concert Hall experiencing classical music played by Singapore Symphony Orchestra, with a special appearance by the world violin child prodigy Sarah Chang, in a Gala concert themed: The Persistence of Memory.

Repertoire:

• Ravel - Rapsodie Espagnole
• Michael Hersch - Ashes of Memory (Asian premiere)
• Sibelius - Violin Concerto in D, Op.47

I must say, I'm surprised I enjoyed it a lot. In the past, classical music, not to mention watching an orchestra, would put me to sleep. However, I had come to develop a liking for classical music, and as well as appreciating orchestral music.

The performance for the gala was conducted by Maestro Lan Shui, whom I think is great. I especially liked the first movement of Hersch's Ashes of Memory; it was moderately paced tinged with melancholy. Ravel's work was also fun to listen to, especially the last movement.

Of course, the attraction that drew me to the concert was Sarah Chang. I paid to watch her play live. And it was worth it. Her violin-playing was top-class and the sound was just beautiful. But darn, she refused to oblige us with an encore. If she does come back next time with Tchaikovsky's Violin Concerto in D, I would be grabbing for the best seat.

I enjoyed the concert so much that I'm towing my sister and WW for another concert in April. This time, I'm paying to listen to Brahms' Symphony No.1 in C minor. Yes, it's Chiaki's song. *cough*NodameCantabileUberFan*cough*

My only complain though, is the timing of the concert. I had to skip dinner in order to travel down to the bay for the concert. Darn hungry throughout the performance.

Can't wait for the next show!

～みはる～

Petition for a safe journey home

All Malaysians in the same boat, please take a few minutes to sign this petition, here!
The news: Online Petition for Nian Ning

It is heart-breaking and frustrating to yet again see this happening. Interstate express bus crashes have become such a mainstay news in the Malaysian media, that it feels indifferent to read of another crash occurring at the highway which took XX lives.

But how does it feel when someone of your age group from similar background coming from the same place is killed in a crash on the same route in the similar vehicle you so often take?

It feels like it could have been YOU on the bus that had crashed.

I'm talking about the 25th January Slim River bus crash which robbed Lee Nian Ning (and Mohd Zailani and Pang Boon Eng) of her (their) life (lives).

According to the news, Nian Ning took a bus from Penang to KL to visit her friends. Absolutely what every youth who are studying/working overseas and back in Malaysia for holidays will do. Vacation is one time to catch up with good ol' friends. Something I would do too.

So she jolly took one of the many express buses serving the North-South highway to the waiting arms of her friends in KL. To their dismay, she never made it there. And why is that? Because the driver with 13-road summons under his belt, who do not have the right to steer the passenger-filled carriage, divided his attention between SMS-ing and speeding on a rainy highway. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that such reckless driving will only end one way: in death. The driver was said to have lost control, the bus overturned an incredulous THREE times before hitting the road divider, flinging out its passengers, killing 3 in the process. Sadly, Nian Ning was one of the 3.

What was especially unbelievable was that the authorities are irresponsive over the tragedy and the damned bus company is neither apologizing for the glaring fault on their part nor showing remorse to the loss of lives they had caused.

What was appalling was that the driver had 13-summons and still driving a passenger vehicle AFTER the Transportation Ministry did a so-called thorough clean-up operation to weed out such unqualified drivers. Did someone say 'corruption'?

What was infuriating was that the damned bus company did NOTHING to clean up its act after regulations were 'refreshed' following another high profile bus crash last year. Did someone say 'tidak-apalah'?

What was terrifying was that I had so frequently taken buses from this damned company to travel home for my holidays.

What was heart-breaking was that Nian Ning's parents had their treasure snatched away from them because of ONE person's irresponsibility. Imagine the reunion dinner they were excitedly anticipating with their daughter who flew back from overseas had turned into a memorial. Imagine their hopes to see their daughter graduating as a brilliant doctor will never come true. Imagine the sorrows of losing your love, your young. Imagine the pain of losing your child in such a cruel way. I can't imagine.

All it took was an irresponsible driver and a corrupted transportation enforcement to snuff out the promising future of a vibrant youth. Wait, let me correct myself.

To snuff out the promising FUTURES of our vibrant YOUTHS.

Please, (government of) Malaysia. When are you going to gather your act?
What does it take for you to start taking this matter seriously?
How many more youths (no, Malaysians) must die before the people who shouldn't be driving are stopped from taking the wheels of the express buses?
How many bus crashes are you waiting before you remove the irresponsible services of the bus companies?
Are the lives of 'ordinary' Malaysians not valuable? (My, I'm sure the situation would be so blown off the top should the one who died in the crash is the child of some top brass)

I cry for the loss of Nian Ning in the Slim River crash that should never happened.
I cry for the loss of all bus express crash victims who never saw their justice served.
I cry for the loss of compassion in the Malaysian government over the value of Malaysian lives.
I cry for the loss of integrity in the people who are entrusted to make our journey home a safe one.

Tell me, how am I supposed to tell people I'm proud being a Malaysian? It's such an embarrassment.

In memory of Nian Ning, and all victims whose justice was never served.

Thank you to friends of Nian Ning who started the petition for endorsing a change.
Visit their website at Bus Crash No More.

Let us each do a little, with hopes of bringing a change to the system that had so long robbed the lives of our loved ones.

～みはる～