A MOMENT, PLEASE…
I cast the burdens from my heart to the fish, and silently called them to gobble up the detritus. I promised to feed them with real meal when I return to the shrine dedicated to four mythical kings who brought Buddhism to the islands.
Perhaps it is my vivid imagination, but they swam from far and began feeding, on something that must have drifted to the spot where I had cast my sorrows.
I believe, somehow, I am beholden to fulfil this pledge to fish who wait, in their watery habitat.
The heart has grown weary since that Lunar New Year.
Tomorrow ushers in another new one, ruled by the Rat, with an opportunity for renewal.
The hopes of the past year have dimmed, but many new dreams flare again.
Who knows what the fates have in their works for us, in the months to come? Even Guanyin, Goddess of Mercy, says in her oracles that no one can know his true destiny.
Life is a journey that begins from the moment we enter this world, but it does not come with a roadmap that leads to that promised land where all our wishes are fleshed out in colour.
It is more like a ticket to ride into the unknown, weighted with emotional baggage along with the way. There’s so much we dream to achieve in a lifetime, places to go to, people we hope to meet and adventures to live.
But few of us dare to follow the compass of our heart, but go with the reality of our mundane lives, hemmed by human fears and frailties, instead.
And, of course, some day, we start counting all the if-only and why-hadn’t-I of life, and wonder if it couldn’t have turned out differently.
Maybe yes, maybe no. Life is like a football game, where players must look for opportunities, or create them.
The rules of play may be pre-determined. But the score of hits and misses is still up to us.
We are all players in life’s great game, but without the luxury of extra time. Or, as Liza Minelli sang in the old movie Cabaret, start by admitting, from cradle to tomb, it isn’t that long a stay.
Why waste time, lingering on regrets and self-pity?
The past cannot be lived again. But today, and the future, can be planned for.
This Lunar New Year, I have therefore resolved to put away fears and disappointment, rather than let them block my forward path.
I will carefully make plans for the rest of the year to come, and live each day, as it unfolds.
Above all, at some point, I must return to that pond in the shrine, and to the Guanyin (Kannon) temple at Asakusa in
Though Guanyin is universal, it is at Senso-ji that she feels most special, for personal reasons.
It is there, too, after my last visit to the shrine with its three-inch golden statuette, that my faith was tested.
But I like to think that my belief had never wavered, for it is to her that I return again and again, for guidance.
In the end, it is faith that keeps us going, and leads us into the future without fear.
Gong Xi Fa Cai
By Alistair Tan.
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～みはる～
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